Tag: hs

curlicuecal:

softdirks:

villains of homestuck

  • sentient chess piece so mad about wearing a hat he goes on a murderous rampage across multiple universes, he eventually becomes part ultimate spirit dog
  • alien empress in a latex bodysuit with a trident who speaks solely in fish puns and is also betty crocker
  • omnipotent guy with a cueball for a head
  • big buff green skeleton time travelling alien demon with a peg leg
  • alternate version of big buff green skeleton time travelling alien demon with a peg leg, as a 13 year old 4chan user who hates women
  • a puppet, which is the vessel for big buff green skeleton time travelling alien demon with a peg leg’s soul
  • guy fieri 
  • some juggalos specifically the icp
  • an alien capricorn clown who can never die

it makes me so mad that this is accurate

madeoftime:

TO BE FAIR. YOu HAVE TO HAVE A VERY HIGH IQ TO uNDERSTAND HOMOSuCK. THE HuMOR IS EXTREMELY SuBTLE. WITHOUT A SOLID GRASP OF ARTISTIC METATHEORY MOST OF THE JOKES WILL GO OVER A TYPICAL READER’S HEAD. ALSO. THERE IS THE ALPHA MALE’S NIHILISTIC OuTLOOK. WHICH IS DEFTLY WOVEN INTO HIS CHARACTERIZATION. HIS PERSONAL PHILOSOPHY DRAWS HEAVILY FROM CHERuBIM CuLTURE, FOR INSTANCE. THE FANS uNDERSTAND THIS STuFF. THEY HAVE THE INTELLECTUAL CAPACITY TO TRuLY APPRECIATE THE DEPTHS OF THESE JOKES. TO REALIZE THAT THEY’RE NOT JUST FuNNY. THEY SAY SOMETHING DEEP. ABOUT LIFE. AS A CONSEQUENCE. PEOPLE WHO DISLIKE HOMOSUCK TRuLY ARE IDIOTS. OF COuRSE THEY WOULDN’T APPRECIATE, FOR INSTANCE, THE HuMOR IN THE ALPHA MALE’S EXISTENTIAL CATCHPHRASE. “FuCK BITCHES, GET MONEY.” WHICH ITSELF IS A CRYPTIC REFERENCE TO JuNIOR MAFIA’S EPIC, “GET MONEY.“I’M SMIRKING RIGHT NOW JUST IMAGINING ONE OF THOSE ADDLEPATED SIMPLETONS SCRATCHING THEIR HEADS IN CONFuSION AS MY GENIuS uNFOLDS ITSELF ON THEIR COMPuTER SCREENS. WHAT FOOLS. HOW I PITY THEM. AND YES. BY THE WAY. I DO HAVE A HOMOSuCK TATTOO. AND NO. YOu CANNOT SEE IT. IT’S FOR THE BITCHES’ EYES ONLY. AND EVEN THEY HAVE TO DEMONSTRATE THAT THEY’RE WITHIN 5 IQ POINTS OF MY OWN (PREFERABLY LOWER) BEFOREHAND.